From time to time I have cause to rethink exactly what coaching is all about and invariably it is a useful exercise to carry out.

The trigger this time was from someone who had agreed that he would benefit from the coaching programme, and then subsequently spoke to colleagues from his industry who immediately assured him that he shouldn’t “waste” his money on me, when they could easily help and advise him anyway.

Naturally the opportunity to avoid spending money is quite an incentive, and so he cancelled our first meeting. However I have spoken to him since, and explained what it is he will get from me, but not from these well-meaning friends.

Yes, no doubt they will be able to point him in the right direction, yes they may be able to put business his way, and yes they will be able to offer positive and probably good advice in many areas. But what they won’t do is work with him over a sustained period, holding him accountable, and making sure he actually does the things they have advised him to do. It is not unusual for my clients to not carry out the actions we agree that they should do, sometimes because they aren’t really sure how to, sometimes because they are too busy doing things they shouldn’t be involved in, but the key is that I won’t let them off the hook until they have done what they know is going to help. Friends or colleagues will make suggestions and offer ideas, but if he doesn’t carry them out they won’t be chasing him!

Furthermore, as a coach, I am working with them to create a business that works without them, and their friends are invariably nowhere near the situation. They won’t have asked him he wants out of life, so their advice will be based on their own goals and beliefs, not his.

So by all means listen to the kind advice which friends or colleagues may offer, but don’t confuse this with the benefits that a business coach will bring you. Meaningful and permanent change for the better.

I know in the past I have commented on the importance of living in “the now”, and I believe that even more strongly the more I hear and see the way people (particularly younger people) behave nowadays.

What I mean by this is the constant need for people to be checking up on what other friends or even acquaintances are doing, rather than concentrating on their own lives and happiness. Social media can of course be a force for good, and gives many people a lot of pleasure, but I often wonder, having recently spent a few days in Norfolk with my daughter and some of her friends, whether they actually notice what is going on around them, and enjoy all the good things they have and do. As a result they also spend huge amounts of time taking photos of themselves to prove to others that they are happy and having even more fun than any one else.

This desperate need for acceptance worries me, and seems to become almost an obsession for many. Various artistes have also expressed a concern about this when fans turn up to their play or concert and film it all rather than actually watch it and experience it (presumably to send to others at a later date).

This takes me on to a phrase which again I have used before, “Why should I care what other people think of me?” If I am genuinely happy and content with myself, I don’t need to tell others, and people inherently know anyway.

Taking this to a business level, stop worrying about what others think, and start living your life for you. Set your goals, set a path to achieve these goals, and make sure you enjoy the journey.

What a disappointment on Saturday evening! No doubt there will be any amount of analysis and recriminations over the coming weeks and months, especially if England loses to Australia in the Rugby World cup next week. So what went wrong?

We could argue forever over the team composition, (I for one think it was the wrong selection in a number of positions) but ultimately it came down to leadership on the field and decision making in high pressure situations. England lost their way badly in the second half, Wales gradually reeling in our score and ultimately winning by one kick. However with stronger leadership this would never have happened – Martin Johnson would never have let a 10 point lead slip in such an important game. I have recently been reading the “21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership” by John C. Maxwell, and two of those stand out for me, those being the law of respect and the law of victory. Whilst people like and admire the captain Chris Robshaw, I am not convinced that people respect him enough, consequently when the chips are down and victory is in the balance, the team simply don’t believe in him enough to ensure we always win the tight encounters.

I think this is reflected in his decision to take the line-out rather than kick for a draw in the final 3 or 4 minutes. It was almost as though he felt the need to show off to his team and crowd. A good leader would have weighed up the risks involved, and even in the cauldron of Twickenham, would have made the right balanced decision. Instead he took the risk to prove himself to others, and may well have ended up taking England out of the World Cup.

Earlier this week I took a day off to go to an auction in London. My mother had wanted to sell something, and we were both intrigued by the process, having never been to an auction before.

The whole sale was going to last about 4 ½ hours, so we weren’t going for the whole time, but in the end attended for about an hour in the morning and an hour in the afternoon. Because it was so long there were two auctioneers. In the morning there was a lady, who I soon began to suspect was still learning her trade. Of course there is nothing wrong with that, everyone has to learn sometime, but the interesting thing was that I could feel her lack of confidence, which in turn made me (and presumably others) less confident in the whole process. A few very minor mistakes were made, but on the whole most things were sold for in and around their estimated values. When we returned in the afternoon there was a new auctioneer who I immediately felt much more comfortable with. He was assured in his actions and speech, he was very clear about who was winning the bidding, and he was much faster in the whole process. He too sold most of the lots, but interestingly enough he achieved much more than the estimated amount on numerous occasions (5 x more in one instance).

Now this may just have been coincidence, but somehow I don’t think so. When someone shows confidence in themselves and their product you will tend to feel much more comfortable buying from them. It comes with familiarity and practice in your sales process. So remember if you want to sell more, know your product, know your process and above all portray confidence.

You know that feeling when everything is getting on top of you, with so much to do, and not enough time to do it? It becomes almost a feeling of desperation, and you wonder how you will ever get through it all, and perhaps most of all, where should you start, because everything seems to be a priority. That is the time when best to take a deep breath and sit back from the business and analyse the situation properly.

The trouble is, because everyone feels like it needs to be done “now”, you also think that taking time to consider your best options is time wasted, so you tend to just dive in and start ineffectually doing little bits of everything. This was very much the case with one of any clients recently, and worse than that because he felt that things were on top of him, he was waking up early trying to work out the best way forward, and consequently he was also overtired, which is never a good thing when making decisions.

And that of course is the key – making decisions. For most people uncertainty is the cause of the greatest worry, and therefore if you are flitting from one thing to another, never making decisions or finishing anything, you simply tend to exacerbate the problem.

So taking time to think things through, (or talk them through with your coach) is invaluable. Writing down all the key things which need to be done, and by when, makes it much clearer in which order to deal with your issues. Understand more clearly what exactly needs to be done with each of your issues, write down what actions need to be taken, and then start to knock them off one by one in entirety, not just partially.

Having a clear plan of action, provides certainty, and with that more confidence. Bit by bit you will soon find that you are back on track, and sleeping a whole lot better.

I remember someone once saying “if you don’t keep track of the score, what is the point in playing the game?” or words to that effect. The reason this phrase came back to me was that I have recently been working with a client, who whilst he actually does set targets both for the business as a whole, and for his sales team, he doesn’t hold them to these targets. In other words even though they have only hit target 3 times out of 8 months, nothing has been said.

The trouble is, that this sets a precedent throughout the business, because essentially although the business owner has agreed on clear targets with his team, and hitting targets is a stated responsibility for each salesperson, they are not held accountable for their short-falls. The same thing therefore would logically apply throughout the business, or at least that would be the likely inference which others could take. Overall the business is doing well and they are planning to grow into new markets, and in so doing are taking on another salesman. Imagine his reaction at the first sales meeting if he sees people failing to hit target time and time again, but nothing is said. I can’t imagine he would feel particularly motivated to drive himself forward with any great enthusiasm or energy.

Clearly things must and will change on this front, but the point is no doubt there are many other business owners who do exactly the same thing (or who don’t even set targets!). So the next time you come to the end of the month, check if you have hit your targets, and if not what are the consequences? Don’t give yourself or your sales team excuses, look for ways to ensure you make up the short fall next month.

Something happened this week which reminded me how much can be achieved in a relatively short time if it is something that you really want.

Essentially my daughter was off on holiday to Morocco for a week with a group of about 15 friends. They had booked a villa which had all sounded lovely, and although they had only paid a very small deposit, assumed all was well. However, about five or six hours before they were due to depart, the girl who had booked it all received an email saying the villa was not finished, and therefore their holiday was cancelled. Everyone was devastated as they had been really looking forward to their trip.

Instead of just saying “Oh well, no holiday”, some of them immediately started looking for alternatives, and believe it or not, within two hours, not only had they found a replacement villa, because it was at such short notice, they also got a better deal than their original destination. Quite a result!

The point is, if you want something bad enough, it is amazing what you can achieve if you focus and start taking action. The same principle of course applies to your business. If you set your goals, and write them down, if they are genuinely things you are striving for, then the chances of getting them are very high. So when things go wrong don’t just give in and decide they you can get by with other less good things, keep fighting, keep doing things, that will help to change things for the better, and who knows, you may get there quicker than you originally thought.

Last week I wrote about not feeling guilty as a business owner, when you take time off work. By chance this week, it just so happens that one of my clients has had an enforced leave of absence having fallen off her horse, and sustained a severe concussion. When I saw her on Monday it was her first day back in the office for ten days, and she had really only come in because she was meant to be meeting with me.

She was a little anxious about what she might find, but as it turned out, things were running smoothly, although as with any business, there were a few issues to resolve. However, the person left in charge was running things well, and because the owner has created a clear and strong business structure where everyone knows what their responsibilities are, all the key tasks were being carried out well.

In fact the most positive, and perhaps surprising, thing was that the team had managed to bring in more new sales than had happened in the previous 2 months. I think this was partially because everyone wanted to show that they could run the business without the owner (rise up to the challenge) and partially because we had set very specific targets at the previous meeting, and it had helped to focus their efforts.

So have a little sit back and think “what would happen if I had to take 3 or 4 weeks off work?” Would the business keep going, or would it falter, or possible even, really struggle. No-one knows when misfortune can strike, but would it be good to know that if it does, you won’t have to worry about the business and your income.

If you would like to be in that position, but are not quite sure how to go about it, why not get in touch with me. I know I can help.

Are you one of those business owners who is afraid to take time off in case your team think you are slacking or not pulling your weight? If you are, you should consider very carefully why it is you are doing what you do, and also have you got the right people working for you?

I come across this attitude a lot when I start working with new clients. This feeling of guilt that takes them over when they take any time off, let alone a holiday. I can understand why people feel like this, but let me put it another way, and perhaps it will help you to move to the next level.

The thing is, the majority of business owners set up their business because they wanted to have a lifestyle which allowed them lots of money, and lots of time (leisure time) to enjoy it. So why is it, once this starts to become a reality, do people shy away from it? Of course no-one likes to be seen as a free-loader taking advantage of others, but what you must remember is that you have already spent years of hard work getting it to a place where you don’t have to be constantly there. Furthermore, you have almost certainly taken risks in setting up the business initially, you may well have invested time and money in yourself to learn new skills, and indeed how to run a business, and you will almost certainly have invested a considerable amount of your own money getting things off the ground.

So essentially you have taken all the risks, you carry all the burden of responsibility for your team, and you take on huge amounts of stress keeping the business going, and ensuring it remains profitable and going forward.

For your staff you have created, a safe environment and a secure job, which pays them well enough to look after them and their families – so how can they say you don’t deserve a break, and ultimately a chance to sit back and let others do the work.

So if you need someone to help you make that happen, give me a call, because I know you have earned it.

Something I haven’t blogged about for some time is business structure, and the value it has in so many ways. People who run small businesses with less than 5 employees, and in particular businesses which involve family members, often can’t see the reason for writing down an organisational structure, after all “everyone knows what they should be doing,” or “everyone mucks in together.” However, this a sure recipe for disaster in the longer run, because no-one is really responsible for any one thing, and the chances of things being missed or duplicated becomes greater and greater as the business grows.

Sometimes business owners say they don’t want to write down a structure, particularly when it comes to including their family members, as they feel it formalises things too much, and may cause conflict. I believe the exact opposite is true, because in fact the clearer everyone is about what is expected of them, the less likely it is that confrontation will occur. The other advantage of specifying the roles and responsibilities is that everyone should know how they should be spending their time. This can be particularly useful where family members work in the business, part time or full time, for without clarity of their responsibilities they are constantly asking the business owner what to do next. In other words the business owner then finds that they are almost having to find things for their employee to do, and worse still, often have to explain how to do it, and then check regularly it is being done correctly. In fact it ends up in the business owner effectively doing the other person’s job, and not being able to concentrate on their own key tasks.

So if you are wondering how to keep employees busy without constant supervision, write down your structure, allocate responsibilities and ensure that what they have to do is systemised.